hey! have been feeling confused lately though that might not be a surprise, just got a word from God that i shouldn't let missions be a hiding point in life and that i should face my problems head on and not bring them to the mission field. I got some encouraging words from bill and marsha burns who gives prophetic words every day and i have to say they are really really accurate!

"Beloved, I am bringing revelation to your heart and mind that will reveal strongholds in your life that have not yet been torn down. I will show you the way of victory, but you must quiet your own soul and refuse to give place to fear. Let Me show you the powers that are arrayed against you so that you can wage an effective spiritual war. I am about to level the playing field by giving you righteous perspective of what was and what is and what is to come, says the Lord."

John 16:13 However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come.

Even as i'm writing all this down the Lord is speaking to me and it does hurt but well how else can i be a good vessel for Him to use.
It is also amazing that even when you know that you have trouble which troubles you every time that all your worries fade away when you're in God's presence. I also know that i do not need to prove anything to anyone.